Wednesday, January 26, 2011

A Dialog About Life - Between Me and My Friend


I have given below a dialog between me and one of my non-mulsim friends. He is a very nice and open guy. He was affected by dengue and was hospitalized for three days.

This dialog took place after a week or two since he got discharged from the hospital.

 
Me : How are you?
My Friend: hi
My Friend: okk
Me : that means
Me : you still have pain in the joints?
My Friend: no
My Friend: i never had pain
Me : Oh
My Friend: :-) only 3 days heavy fever
My Friend: but i had body pains when i wake up
Me : Ok
Me : How are things now?
My Friend: going on
My Friend: glad to be alive
My Friend: i saw few people die at the hospital .... now i look at life differently
Me : What's the difference?
Me : difference in the view
My Friend: when it comes to end
My Friend: 1. There is only you
My Friend: 2. No one can help
My Friend: 3. It doesn't matter what you did or have
My Friend: 4. you are helpless
My Friend: 5. its always painful when u die
My Friend: 6. they still want to live
My Friend: :-(
My Friend: i seriously thought i was gonna die so ...above is so true :-)
Me : What is the difference between item 2 and 4
Me : and 1
My Friend: 2 -4 same
My Friend: but 1 is different
My Friend: u know 1 girl in the next block screamed for 3 days ..and died ...
My Friend: horrible life we have :-(
Me : must be painful
Me : How is item 1 different
Me : What do you mean by item 1
My Friend: when you are i'll and you know its beyond anyones help ...you feel very lonely ..its difficult to explain unless you experience
Me : I understand
My Friend: we have to do lots of good things in this life ...maybe then when we die we may not feel so down
Me : That's what I was about to ask
Me : You said
Me : 3. It doesn't matter what you did or have
Me : I felt like it matters what you did
My Friend: by that i meant ..like job/business
Me : Understood
My Friend: hospital is a very good place to understand life as a whole ...oneday we all go there to comeeback in a box :-)
Me : You said that when you strongly felt that you were about to die, you felt very lonely. We believe that when people bury us after death, we still hear and see what happens around us. We will be calling the people, and scream not leave us alone.
Me : Imagine that
My Friend: ya i believe that too
Me : At that moment what guards us are only the good deeds we did in the world
My Friend: I was not ready for death this time ..but next time i wan't to be ready and strong ...
Me : Good
My Friend: yes yes thats rue
My Friend: its a good thing i got dengi ....
Me : How do you plan to get ready?
Me : I mean what did you feel like you should have done when you were at the hospital?
My Friend: i was not sure i did enough good
Me : what do you mean by good?
Me : Religiously or in general?
My Friend: like good things like helping people and spiritually
My Friend: and i haven't made sure my wife would be ok after my death
Me : in general is a subset of religiously
Me : You were more worried about the subset? or the other part?
Me : No one can make sure that how the world would be after we leave. When I say world, it includes wives.
Me : Some even worry about grand children.
My Friend: ha ha yes
My Friend: i think its very difficult to get ready for death at any age ...that fear is inherent
My Friend: if you can get rid of that fear only you can get a peaceful death
Me : You need to be spiritually strong from the inside, to get rid of that fear
My Friend: yes but the problem is ..you don't know how strong you are until you actually face it
Me : True
Me : That's why I always ask the question "what is the purpose of life"
Me : If we are not clear in that, we will never be peaceful while we die
Me : We may have different answers
Me : But we need an answer to oursleves
My Friend: ya ..
Me : An answer that is convincing enough to ourselves to keep us in peace even in the deathbed
My Friend: absolutely ..depends on each of us thinking and belifes
Me : Yes
Me : Absolutely
My Friend: you said "what is the purpose of life"
My Friend: but my question is
My Friend: "what is the purpose of so much suffering in this life"
Me : Is it "what is the purpose of so much suffering in this life" or "Why people suffer so much in this life"
Me : What is the exact question?
My Friend: from what i see people suffer for no reasons ...like the guy next to my bed ..he is a really good guy ..got his both kindney damaged
Me : So, it is "why the life is filled with so much suffering?"
My Friend: his leg had a wound like he got shout
My Friend: shot
My Friend: yes thats the question
Me : Are you looking for an answer from me, in my perspective
Me : ?
My Friend: nop ... i don't think anyone can answer
Me : No, it is a simple question with a simple answer, but from different frame of reference
My Friend: ok so...
My Friend: simple answer?
Me : Life is a test in which the one who succeeds will get rewarded and others will not
Me : Suffering as well as Happiness is part of the test
My Friend: but its not a fair test
Me : Why?
My Friend: some people suffer unnessasarly ..like the girl who died after screaming 3 days ..she was young ...got that disease from the small age
My Friend: she never had a better chance
Me : Suffering is not suffering if you know it is a part of the test, and happiness is not happiness if you know it is a part of the test
My Friend: but the girl was only screaming through her whole life ...thats not a fair tests
Me : Suffering and happiness and all events are chances to get rewarded. They are equal in that aspect.
My Friend: how can some one get such pain for a test
Me : If I told you that the richest and wealthiest man in the world is having the most horrible test for being the richest and wealthiest, does it amaze you
Me : ?
My Friend: if i cut your leg today ..and reward you with a brand new legs after 50 years ..is that a good deal :-)
Me : If I say the test that Bill Gates is undergoing - the test of how you behave when you are wealthy - is a more horrible test than the girl you are talking about, does that makes sense for you?
Me : You think the girl's test is unfair and the Bill's test is fun
My Friend: yes
Me : That means you miss the purpose of the test
My Friend: Bill Gates seems to be enjoying
Me : Success is determined in the hereafter, not here
Me : Bill gates will be intoxicated by the wealth, and forget God. His test is may be harder to pass. Everytime there is a pain, and every time it reduces, the girl will know that there is a super power. If she acted by being thankful to the relief, she'll be successful in the hereafter
Me : You were measuring the test and the results in terms of this world
Me : Test is in this world, reward is in the hereafter
Me : Even bearing the will forgive our sins
My Friend: thats what i'm asking this
Me : as per our belief
My Friend: if i cut your leg today ..and reward you with a brand new legs after 50 years ..is that a good deal
Me : If the leg I am having will be there only for 50 years, and the leg that I will receive after 50 years will be there with me forever, millions and millions of years, it is worth considering isn't it?
Me : Actually for bearing that pain, what she deserves is an eternal happy life with all the wealth and health she can think of
Me : That's worth a deal
Me : Going for prayers
My Friend: up to you 2 decide
My Friend: (y) we have 30--40 years left lets see
Me : I am back
Me : I once had a pending operation in my right leg, which I was not able to move at that time
Me : Doctors said that there is a slight chance that the operation will be successful
Me : I was happy because it was a test and to pass that test I just need to be patient and the reward will be high
Me : See suffering "as you see" is a chance of reward as "I see"
Me : I am happy about the suffering, and you are terrified about it
Me : That's the difference
My Friend: not terrified ... sad
Me : Ok
Me : I happy in happy and happy in sadness as well
My Friend: (y)
Me : Thanks
Me : That's what I meant when I said that there is an answer, but from a different frame of reference
Me : May be it is hard to comprehend from your frame of reference
My Friend: my frame of reference is like this ....suffering is inherent for everyone in this world , no one can escape ...whearther we get rewarded for that of course not sure ...
Me : Suffering has two aspects, physical and mental
My Friend: and i don't see fair amount of suffering
My Friend: it changes from person to person
Me : Yes
Me : That's the point
Me : Life is inequal
Me : According to communists civilization will come to a halt if everyone gets equal
Me : Imbalance is needed to move on..
My Friend: no thats in wealth
My Friend: not in physical pain
My Friend: if there is no physical and mental pain in this world ..this world will be very beautiful
Me : What people should be worried is whether they get equal opportunity to earn rewards in the hereafter
Me : If that is equal, then the test is equal
Me : If that is not, then the test is not
Me : Proportion of happiness and sadness can vary
My Friend: so u say Bill Gates and the Girl screamed all her life and died ...both got the same chance and a fair test ?
Me : In that specific case, I think the girl got an easier test. Considering the whole life, I think they have equal chance
My Friend: if that girl got easier chance ..thats even unfair ...because Bill Gates didn't have the chance of getting that bone marrow cancer ...
My Friend: and get rewarded easyly
Me : That's not the only test, it is just the part of the test. The girl will then get harder ones and bill will get some easier ones later in the life. That's why I said "Considering the whole life, I think they have equal chance"
My Friend: the girl never got easy one ..she died
Me : What she got was highly rewarding small and easy tests, with a short life span. What bill is getting is different kind of tests with a larger life span, but they all will have equal opportunity to score.
My Friend: i would like to think like this The girl got punished for something she has done in her previous life ...now bad karma has gone in her next life she may have a better chance to do good and improve
Me : Good
Me : Its all about beliefs
My Friend: :)
Me : But there are answers in different frames of reference
My Friend: yes
Me : If you don't believe in the reward system, and that the world and life are created by God, my answer is just another theory to you
My Friend: yes like mine to you
Me : If I don't believe in rebirth, and don't think that the life is sufferring, your theory is no worth for me
My Friend: yes i know
Me : The point we were talking about is that we have answers, and they should convince us, so that we'll have a peaceful death if we live true to those answers.
My Friend: :) yes
Me : Anyway, this is a very nice conversation.
Me : I'll try to save it somewhere
My Friend: yes , just make sure you are ready in anyway , as a friend thats my advice ..
My Friend: and thank you for the blessing when i was in the hospital ..i think that helped a lot
Me : Is it?
My Friend: yes if someone wish good in heart ...it has instant effect on others ..that i belive
Me : Thanks
My Friend: and i know u wished me well in good heart ..i felt better :-)
Me : It was a prayer to God to cure you. The prophet used to do what I did to you.
My Friend: ya i know